Misuse of Wardrobe

"We need all the costumes for our commercial!" one group told me today.

"How could you?" I asked, looking over at the judge's robe, the chef's jacket, the cowpoke vest, the velvet vest, the construction vest, the blue scrubs, the white lab coat, the fancy blazer, and the three aprons, not to mention all 12 hats. "There are only 4 people in your group!"

"Oh, we're trying to make a closet," they explained. "Somebody's going to be in there."

"We have closets out in the hall," I told them.

"That would be better," they agreed.

Tech Lag

"Can we put aliens in our commercial?" a couple of kids asked me today.

"You mean extra-terrestrials?" I clarified. "Sure."

Then they launched into this convoluted concept for some kind of device that the aliens would want, but was actually a funnel worn on someone's head.

"Why do they aliens want it?" I asked. 

They conferred. "I think it will allow them to understand humans," suggested one.

"That's cool," I agreed, "but maybe you can expand it so that people use it, too, to translate automatically from one language to another.

"Isn't that Alexa?" another student remarked, and the 'duh' was strongly implied.

Turns out? She was right. How did I miss that? And how long will it be before we all just wear those devices?

The Show

What can I say about the crowd at Jerry Seinfeld's sold-out show last night? Like us, they were mostly over 50 and white. The exceptions were teenagers with their parents and white guys in their 30s who, if overheard conversations can be any measure, work for Republicans on the Hill. (And Wolf Blitzer was definitely there, too.)

And what can I say about the venue? The lines moved quickly, security was efficient, the staff was helpful, but the seats were underwhelming folding chairs, slightly padded but packed verrrry closely together.

How about the show itself?  Well, Seinfeld was funny, but not hilarious, with a much more animated style than I expected, especially given the deadpan persona of his television show.This Jerry Seinfeld grabbed the mic from its stand and paced and grimaced and gestured for the entire show. The stool on the stage was merely to hold his water.

In the end? Seinfeld is a rich, white, heterosexual dude in his late 60s, so the jokes about growing up in the 60s and 70s and even raising kids, kind of landed with us two married, white middle aged teacher ladies, but we probably didn't connect with about half of his material. 

Even so, there we were. And honestly, I don't regret a moment.

Sold!

There was crow poop all over the car yesterday morning when we left for work. On winter evenings, large murders of crows gather at dusk in the trees above our parking lot before flying off en masse to roost. It's cool, but it can get messy. Yesterday's mess was a little grosser than usual with chunky splatters on the windshield and by the door handles, but like many things, I forget about it until it's right in front of me again. 

So this afternoon, when I went out to run a couple of errands, I made a stop at the carwash down the street first. The establishment had recently changed hands and had gone from a wait inside to a ride-through car wash. Even so, an employee greeted me at the pay gate. There he explained a grand-opening promotion they were running where I could get 2 months of unlimited daily car washes for 29.99. "That would only be 50 cents a day," he said. 

"I might need it!" I laughed, gesturing to the crow droppings. 

He nodded sympathetically. "If it doesn't come off today," he told me, "I'll let you go through again."

The Future is Now

I was digging around this morning in the cabinet where I keep the games in my classroom. Some of the kids were playing Spot-it, and I asked them if they had ever played Set. Several said they had, and I realized that although I owned a couple of decks, it had literally been years since I or anyone else had seen them. 

I was first introduced to the game over thirty years ago by my young cousin, Jennifer. She was 8 or 9 at the time and had played it in some gifted pull-out sessions at school. I was training to be a teacher and the two of us loved playing games, so Set was a good fit. Back then, Jennifer liked playing with me because I wouldn't let her win, so she knew if she beat me it was fair and square and a much sweeter victory.

I found the games in the back corner of the cupboard in a little crate with some other cards, among them something called Table Talk which was comprised of a deck of conversation starters. I have no idea when or where I acquired the game, but the first card I looked at happened to be the exact same question I posted for the warm-up on Monday. It occurred to me then that the game might be a helpful source of Chat questions, and so I set it aside when I pushed the crate back into the corner.

This afternoon I was sorting through the questions, and although many are good for sixth graders, a few like What does your dream kitchen look like? and What advice do you have for newlyweds? just aren't relevant. I did come across a question that hinted at the age of the game, though.

As Seen on TV

"What do you mean you're going to "see" Seinfeld?" a friend asked me at school the other day when we were talking about our weekend plans.

"Jerry Seinfeld is playing two shows at the Anthem on both Friday and Saturday," I explained, "and we have tickets."

Heidi has been having similar interactions with friends this week: they are surprised that Seinfeld is touring, and impressed that we are going.

"I hope you told them about Gordon Ramsay's Fish and Chips, too!" I laughed when she told me about her latest conversation. "Because that kind of rounds out the evening, right?"

The Stage is Set

The costumes are hung, the props unpacked, the equipment checked, and the blank storyboards prepared. After demonstrating their theoretical knowledge of persuasive techniques on a test, my students will start their commercials tomorrow. 

Bring it on-- I'm more than ready for a couple weeks of creative chaos!