As We Go

It was slow going in my garden this afternoon. Treat and I were using the lumber I bought yesterday to build some raised beds. We dug holes for the corner posts and then used my battery-powered drill to drive screws through the side rails and attach them. The angle was very challenging to get the screws started, and it was frustrating to try and make the bed true and even. 

When it was done, I looked at where we had placed and sighed. "I changed my mind," I told Treat, I think I want this one over there and the other one here. 

He took the news with good nature. 

"Maybe we can just pick this up and move it?" I suggested, and we did.

Well that changed everything! We assembled the next bed one end at a time, and then stood it on its side to add the long pieces. Then we dug trenches and carried it to the location we had prepared. It was way quicker and a lot easier. 

"I guess it's all a learning curve," I said to Treat.

"Definitely," he agreed. "I'm going to remember this for the next time I build beds."

In the Spirit

This was spirit week at school and for the first time in 29 years I participated every single day. School colors Monday was easy; I just wore one of the many shirts I've been given over the years. Tuesday was wear bright colors and sunglasses, so tie-dye was my choice of wardrobe then. Crazy sock day on Wednesday seemed a bit of a waste, but I dutifully wore a wild patterned pair beneath my jeans. Thursday was pajama day, and today was college wear.

Years ago I used to wish I could wear my pjs to school, but our principal was adamantly opposed to such a spirit day. When she retired, pajama day was instituted, but until this week? I never actually had participated. For some reason it just seemed a bit wrong, but yesterday I put my doubts aside and wore some buffalo plaid flannel sleep pants and a long sleeved T, along with my slippers. 

Dressing that way was okay, but it was a little weird to come home and change out of my pajamas and into something more comfortable.

Not Very Close Captioning

The audio on the school-made video we were watching in homeroom was too low, so I turned on the auto-captioning to help us follow along. The production was of a panel discussion with current seventh graders answering questions that the sixth graders had submitted about next year. 

One of the topics of interest was field trips, and the student being interviewed mentioned the one and only trip they had taken this year. "We went to the Outdoor Lab," he reported in a mask-muffled voice. 

My students gasped when they read the auto-caption: We went to the after life. 

And when asked about one of the best things about seventh grade? "Definitely the Outdoor Lab," responded another student.

Or Definitely the altar of love, according to the auto-captions.

"I'm not sure if I want to go on that field trip," giggled one of my students.

GOAT

Another fun feature of the hyperbole lesson the other day was the warm up question: What's the greatest thing in the world?

Bless their hearts; my students are very earnest. When the class list was compiled, family, friends, and free time were on the top followed closely by food, music, and sleep. 

"What do you think is the greatest thing in the world?" someone asked me.

"Definitely the morning announcements," I said, laughing when she gasped. "They are soooooooo much better than love, dogs, or vacation!"

"Really?" she shook her head.

"No!" I replied. "It's hyperbole. But I do love the morning announcements!"

This morning when my homeroom kids came in the tally was still on the whiteboard. "I see there's still only one vote for the morning announcements," one of the students noted.

"And that's all there will be," I told him. "We're done with that question.

"Don't feel bad," he continued. "There's only one vote for world peace, too."

Freestyle

Today was my last day as Professor Marshmallow, but with a lesson on rhyming coming up tomorrow? 

Ima be DJ Marshymarshmallow next.

Word.

A Bit of an Overstatement

Today, when the lesson was on hyperbole, the fun challenge was to find your "superhero name" based on a silly list and your initials. I know my audience, though, and the activity was very entertaining for all of us. In fact, coupled with the warm-up question, What is the greatest thing in the world? (sleep, the weekend, food, love, friendship, yo mama?), it provided all sorts of inspiration for humorous hyperbole poems.

According to the list, my alter ego is Professor Marshmallow, an identity I embraced with a homemade nameplate and a modified Patrick-Stewart-as-Dr-X accent. And when a table of kids was a little too chatty? 

Quoth Professor Marshmallow: "Don't make me go all hot chocolate on you!" 

Since 1665

"I need to clean off the deck," I sighed this morning, cringing at the clutter of empty hanging baskets, pots for plants, dead leaves, and the remains of an empty bird nest I had recently knocked from the rafters. As I mentally added the task to my ever so long list of spring chores, I took a deep breath and remembered what I realized this morning: When I retire? There should be nothing stopping me checking off everything on my to-do list. I may finally organize my life.

"This place is going to be spic and span when I retire!" I told Heidi, who raised her eyebrows and nodded appreciatively. "Spic and span!" I repeated, and then wondered where that phrase (as accurate as it was to describe my post-retirement aspirations) came from. I haven't heard it in a while, I thought. Is it some kind of slur I should remove from my vocabulary?

Thank goodness for the internet when it comes to questions like that. A quick search revealed that the phrase was first seen in print in 1665. It derives from "spiksplinternieuw" a Dutch expression about brand new ships and their spiky wood splinters. My research also led me to a nifty feature that the Merriam-Webster website has, called Time Traveler. There you can read all the words that were first seen in print in any given year; it is like a time-elapsed view of the evolution our language.

What other words were first published in 1665? Notably to me on the list of 94 were amok, biography, fossil, putty, rationalize, and volcano, but the list is fascinating, and you would certainly be intrigued.

Playing around with it, instead of cleaning the deck, (rabbit hole: 1938) I also discovered that zip code, T-ball, salsa, ramen, and porn weren't part of the language until 1962. What a year of innovation that was!