On Brand

I noticed a billing issue with my Disney+ account, so I turned to the chat feature on the website for assistance. There, I was paired with an agent named Irene, who promised to get to the bottom of the situation. 

Here's the next part of our conversation:

Despite the mixed message, Irene resolved the issue a short while later. And I was grateful for her help.

Please Proofread for Meaning

I jumped when I saw it. Walking Lucy through the green spaces around and between the adjoining complexes of the neighborhood, we came upon a dead crow. At first, I simply pulled Lucy away from it, but as we continued on, I thought about how few dead crows we see, considering how many living ones gather in all the trees of the neighborhood all winter long. 

Then I thought of avian flu. I have been following the details of the disease loosely, but I know it is on the rise. The virus can pass between species, and so egg prices are skyrocketing, there have been several reports of contaminated milk, and some cats recently died after eating raw food made from infected chickens. 

I decided to report the crow to Animal Control in case they are testing for the virus, and I found a form on their website to report concerns. Thank you, my screen read once I had submitted. You will hear from us within 48 hours.

And I did. Today, I received the following reply:

Subject: Crow Concerned 

Hello, 

We received your email regarding the deceased crow found near the Windgate Condominium. We're currently not collecting any dead crows for testing. We are only picking up deceased animals that are considered rabies vectors. As precocious, for any deceased animal, do not touch it with your bare hands when disposed of. Thank you for contacting us.

I get it. Avian flu isn't a big thing, and I'm actually glad.

However, I must also point out that this flawed correspondence would not be considered worthy of a Mystery Shopper.

The Mystery Shopper

Here’s how to make money with a side gig and how long it will take to see the extra income was the subtitle of the article link I received in my email this morning. Despite appearances, the site was legit, and one of the suggestions was to become a "mystery shopper" for one of the several companies that employ such independent contractors.

My interest? Was piqued, and I spent an hour or so completing the orientation slideshow and taking the subsequent quiz just to see what the job entails. After acing the material, I was "hired" on the spot, but I found that, somewhat unexpectedly, every assignment comes with its own extensive set of directions and a quiz. There was also a lot of emphasis on making sure the reports are correctly written with specific examples and details, as well as submitted in a timely fashion. It actually warmed my English teacher's heart a bit.

It seems like shoppers can earn between 10 and 20 bucks a pop, although some gigs require you to buy merchandise that you can be reimbursed for (as long as it is below $10.00, unless you get permission to spend extra from the company contact for the job). 

For example, one nearby opportunity that is currently available involves going to an athletic shoe store, waiting for a salesperson to approach you, and then asking for a recommendation for a specific pair of shoes. The shoes are up to you, but there were suggestions such as I need some pickleball shoes, I want to run a marathon, but I pronate, or Do you have the shoes Taylor Swift was wearing at the Chief's game? 

Then, you had to try the shoes on, buy them, and return them the next day, all the while evaluating the store and the employee according to a detailed set of criteria that you can NEVER bring onto the actual premises with you. If you successfully complete that task, you will be paid 18 bucks.

But, as amusing as I found all the complicated directions and as good as I was at the tests, I just couldn't see myself actually doing the job.

Ai Yai Yai

I updated my laptop this afternoon to the latest version of Apple OS. When at last, after it restarted several times, I was able to access the machine, I got a message about the new AI (that's Apple Intelligence) features I *could* use. "Create fun, original images in seconds with Image Playground," one notification encouraged me, and then helpfully launched the app.

I had the option of describing anything I wanted to in words and then seeing the image generated or starting with a photo. I tried the first way but was disappointed in the white cat with devil horns I requested. (Yes, I was inspired by that naughty Tibby, who happened to be sitting on the table.) Even when I refined the description to have both ears and horns, the app just gave me the image of a white cat with a tiny, not-so-very-demonic mohawk.

Perhaps I should have exited then, but curiosity made me click on the photo option, where I chose one of the many selfies in my camera roll and was presented with an eerie artificial version of myself. I made her hair a bit lighter and then gave her a flannel shirt, but she was still a bit off. 

She sure is smiley, though!

You're Going to Do that Right Here?

It's been a while since I've spent any significant amount of time at a public library. Back when I was teaching, there was a library right down the hall, complete with interlibrary loan. Besides that, most books are available digitally, which is a quick and easy way to get them. But today was the day this month for our cleaning lady to come, and even though my grocery shopping was finished, she was still working, so I headed down to the library to hang out for a bit.

I found an empty table complete with a plug to charge my laptop if necessary and sat down to read the news online. Then, after checking the door cam and seeing Estela was still working, I checked my email and did a few word puzzles, then stretched my legs and looked over to the fiction section. Just then, a guy in his mid-thirties sat down across from me and started unpacking a bag of takeout. 

My eyes grew wide-- how could this be allowed? I surreptitiously glanced toward the two staff members at their counter. They seemed completely unperturbed by this display of, ahem, EATING in the LIBRARY! Clearly, things had changed in the time I had been away. 

I wasn't quite sure how I felt about these new policies, plus the smell of the burger and the sound of my tablemate's chewing was rather distracting. I checked my phone again. There was Estela, heading for her car, so I packed up my things and left the cafeteria, I mean the library.

Best Guess

Remembering that today was February 2, I checked the Groundhog report when I got up this morning, but as so often happens, Google's use of AI to generate answers proved inaccurate and confusing. "There will be six more weeks of winter," it proclaimed confidently, "because the groundhog did not see his shadow." (The highlighting was theirs.) 

I scratched my chin and investigated further. Turns out, Punxsutawney Phil did indeed see his shadow (highlighting mine), and so tradition has it that there will be six more weeks of winter. I also discovered that in the 135 years that we have turned to the groundhog on this day, he has seen his shadow 85% of the time, and his rate of accuracy is only about 35%.

The experience reminded me of an anecdote my nephew tells about the time one of the 8th graders he was working with was convinced that Abraham Lincoln owned slaves. To prove her assertion, she Googled the question and then flipped her iPad around to show him the AI-generated reply that, yes, Lincoln was a slave owner.

"Did you check the sources for that answer?" he asked.

"No!" she told him. "That's too much work!"

To the search engine's credit, I could not replicate either of those inaccuracies when I repeated both queries a moment ago, so there is some system at work within the system to right its wrongs. 

And, as galling as AI can be, it's gotta be more accurate than the groundhog.

February Evening

 

At the end of our walk late this afternoon, the sun had just set, and the air was cold and still. We could see crows gathering by the hundreds in the bare branches of the trees on the hill, and a new crescent moon hung low in the sky with Venus just beyond. I caught my breath and stood still.

And then I fumbled with my phone to capture the moment.

But I couldn't quite do it.