Friday, April 3, 2015

Official Portrait

I recognized him the minute we walked in the door of the UPS Store: it was the same guy who helped us with our big shipment in December. This time we were simply there to acquire passport photos for Heidi; the store was empty of other customers, and there were three employees on duty, so I had high hopes of an expedient experience.

As it turned out, although there were three  folks in uniform, it was actually just Dave and the two women he was training. So even something so simple as having a photo taken and printed became an elaborate ordeal, narrated in minute detail by Mr. Neurotic-attention-to-detail, so it was kind of a lengthy process involving finding the digital camera, moving a large rack of mailing tubes, asking Heidi to step forward, backward, forward, not smile, smile a little, look at the shot, reframe and retake and repeat, locate the cable, plug into the printer, choose the proper setting (no not that one) trim the prints and place them in an official blue cardboard cover, then ring the sale, no not that code, no the other one, swipe again, sign, wait for the receipt and...

We had parked in a 15 minutes or less spot in the lot, and by the end of the transaction I was standing by the door scanning for tow trucks or meter maids, but after a comprehensive discussion of just how blue Heidi's eyes are, they finally closed the little folder and handed it to her, and our business was finally complete.

On the upside, I do feel fully qualified to take and print and ring up a passport photo down there.

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