Saturday, October 9, 2010

And I Am Not Making This Up

I stopped by the grocery store on the way home last night. As I came around the end of an aisle I was surprised by a six foot pig in a black teddy with garters and bustier. I nodded, smiled politely, and walked past, the oddness of the incident only fully registering a few steps beyond. With wrinkled brow, I turned to look again, but the pig had vanished.

I didn't really think that I had imagined it, but despite the fact that the store was sort of crowded, there were no other shoppers around for a reality check. Plus, the more I thought about it, what had it been doing there? At first I had assumed that it was some sort of product promotion, but that get-up really didn't fit with anything that they were selling at the grocery store. Also the pig wasn't doing anything other than standing there when I went past; it wasn't selling anything, nor did it approach me in any way.

I shook my head, only questioning my sanity slightly, and continued my shopping.

It was in the dairy section that I next encountered the pig. This time it was walking briskly toward me. There was a guy a few paces ahead of it, but if he noticed anything unusual he sure didn't show it. They passed me and disappeared around the corner. You can bet I was on my guard after that, but as I finished shopping and paid for my groceries, I did not see any more giant pigs. It was with relief that I crossed the parking lot, but as I approached my car a silver mini-van screeched toward me at high speed. I jumped aside and gasped as it careened away.

Riding shotgun? The pig.

Driving? The guy from the dairy aisle.

Really.

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